I counsel a lot of people who struggle because of words that were spoken to them as children. Certainly, God can use it for good as He helps them find their identity in Him, but how sad when our kids have to overcome our parenting, rather than remember it with gratitude. You kids will be grown before you know it. How will they remember you? They may know you love them, but do they know you like them?
2 Samuel 3 & 4
Do Your Kids Know You LIKE Them?
In the Light of the King’s (& Queen’s) Face
Verse 15, “In the light of the king’s face is life, and his favor is like a cloud of the latter rain.”
Leaders have a great opportunity to be a blessing by encouraging those under them. My husband recently picked up a book about the top 10 mistakes leaders make. One of the big 10 was failing to encourage!
No where do we have a greater opportunity to encourage (or discourage!) than in our homes with our spouses and with our children.
That’s one reason why husbands are commanded to live with their wives in a understanding way (1 Pet. 3.7) and wives are commanded to show respect for their husbands (Eph. 5.33) and to have a gentle spirit (1 Pet. 3.2). Even when we must reprove one another we are to do it with gentleness (Gal. 6.1).
As parents, Colossians 3.21 instructs us to “not provoke [our] children, lest they become discouraged.” Parenting is not about giving our children everything they want (far from it!) or allowing them to do what pleases them, but we can and should parent in a way that encourages them and not in a way that discourages them.
Megan Scheibner and her husband Steve have a website called “Character Health.” In her blog she wrote:
There are many things that my children know. They know how to read, they know how to pray, they know how to do their chores, etc. But, there are just as many things that I assume my children know without ever making sure that my assumption is correct … The first is this: don’t assume your children know you like them. Yes, my children know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I love them, however, do they know that I like them?
How are your relationships with your children? Is it all about what they do wrong? Is it all about getting their homework and chores done? Is it all about the next scheduled activity? Do you ever take the time to just let your kids know you like them and enjoy spending time with them?
They’ll be grown before you know it. How will they remember your parenting? Consider making it a goal to find something good to say to each of your children every day, some way, as Megan said, of letting them know you like them.
Today’s Other Readings:
2 Samuel 3 & 4:
Politics as Usual
There truly is nothing new under the sun. As David rises to greater power, we see political infighting (Abner and Joab), jostling for power (Abner), and the forming of alliances through human means rather than God’s (probably the reason David took many of his wives).
Even though David was God’s chosen king he fell far short. One of the things kings were strictly forbidden to do was to gather wives and horses, gold and silver, and the like (Deut. 17.14-20). They were to rely on God and to depend on His power and means. Yet, he resorted to human plans and resources.
As is the case with so many biblical stories, it should give us hope that God can and will use each of us. But it shouldn’t give us an excuse not to learn from the mistakes of our spiritual ancestors, as well as, our own.
Trust in God Alone
The psalmist continues his theme of trusting in God and making Him your Rock. He warns that all else will fail us:
“Surely men of low degree are a vapor, men of high degree are a lie; if they are weighed on the scales, they are altogether lighter than vapor. Do not trust in oppression, nor vainly hope in robbery; If riches increase, do not set your heart on them” (vv. 9-10).
We are warned against trusting in our own perceived humility, in our own power or influence, in forcing our will on others, in stealing or deceiving to get what we want, or in financial success. All those things will fail you, as David learned, but God never fails!
In Our Own Hometown
Verse 44, “For Jesus Himself testified that a prophet has no honor in his own country.”
Even in Jesus’ personal life we see the truth many of us have learned: often our own families are the most critical, the least likely to see God’s hand in our lives, and the last ones to receive biblical truth from us.
That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be faithful to speak the truth in love as we have opportunity. But we should also be careful to live uprightly before them, so we don’t give them reason to reject the gospel.
What about You? Questions to Ponder or Journal:
What about with your kids? Do they know you like them?
How is your trust in God? Do you trust in Him alone or do you put your trust in the things of this world?
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