If you’re like most people, friends and family members talk to you all the time. They share struggles and hurts and they are looking to you for input. “How did you handle a similar situation?” or “What would you do?” Those are questions people often ask. What it boils down to is we are all counseling.

If you’re a parent, you are constantly advising your children. You may be talking to your daughter about that mean girl at school or the pain of not being invited to the party. Or to your son about his first love and how she broke his heart.

The question is, “Are we counseling well?” Are we giving godly or worldly advice? And how can we be better equipped to do it well?

Welcome, to “God’s Word Day by Day,” my daily post. Whether you’ve been following me for a while or are new to the blog, I’m so glad you’re here. 

Today’s Readings:

Exodus 35 & 36
Psalm 22.1-8
Proverbs 8.6-11
Matthew 26.26-50

We Are All Counseling

Exodus 35 & 36:

With Willing Hearts

Before I talk about counseling, I’d like to look at a portion of chapter 35:

22 They came, both men and women, as many as had a willing heart, and brought earrings and nose rings, rings and necklaces, all jewelry of gold, that is, every man who made an offering of gold to the LORD. 23 And every man, with whom was found blue, purple, and scarlet thread, fine linen, goats’ hair, red skins of rams, and badger skins, brought them. 24 Everyone who offered an offering of silver or bronze brought the LORD’s offering. And everyone with whom was found acacia wood for any work of the service, brought it.

25 All the women who were gifted artisans spun yarn with their hands, and brought what they had spun, of blue, purple, and scarlet, and fine linen. 26 And all the women whose hearts stirred with wisdom spun yarn of goats’ hair. 27 The rulers brought onyx stones, and the stones to be set in the ephod and in the breastplate, 28 and spices and oil for the light, for the anointing oil, and for the sweet incense. 29 The children of Israel brought a freewill offering to the LORD, all the men and women whose hearts were willing to bring material for all kinds of work which the LORD, by the hand of Moses, had commanded to be done.

And in chapter 36:

2 Then Moses called Bezalel and Aholiab, and every gifted artisan in whose heart the LORD had put wisdom, everyone whose heart was stirred, to come and do the work. 3 So they continued bringing to him freewill offerings every morning.

And look at the result.

The Result

4 Then all the craftsmen who were doing all the work of the sanctuary came, each from the work he was doing, 5 and they spoke to Moses, saying, “The people bring much more than enough for the service of the work which the LORD commanded us to do.” 6 So Moses gave a commandment, and they caused it to be proclaimed throughout the camp, saying, “Let neither man nor woman do any more work for the offering of the sanctuary.” And the people were restrained from bringing, 7 for the material they had was sufficient for all the work to be done—indeed too much.

Do you see the combination? God gives the gifts and abilities. He stirs our hearts, and then all who are willing serve and give.

And the result is more than enough.

I wonder what our churches could do today if all, or even most of the members, were willing to use the gifts and talents God had given them and to give freely of the resources God had provided.

There would be no need for long-term building programs and no shortage of opportunities to provide ministry to a hurting world!

Counseling & Seasons for Ministry

It’s certainly important to give and serve in ministries as we have the ability to do so. But there is another issue that I have encountered throughout my own years in ministry. I believe that some specific ministries have seasons. It’s easy to get over-committed, lose focus, and neglect some of our primary ministries like our ministries to our spouses and children.

Since biblical counseling has been one of my primary areas of ministry, I have frequently met young women who have a desire to help others. They often have the desire to grow and be trained in counseling, but they have young children at home and a busy household. Sometimes they are homeschooling or involved in other things with their children. They can get frustrated because they simply don’t have the time to do what they believe they’re called to do.

The same is true for husbands with young families. They need to focus on leading their families, taking the responsibility to teach them the Word by leading family devotions and spending time with their wives and children.

This doesn’t mean young parents should not be involved in their churches, but it must be kept in balance.

I explain to them that while it may be a calling, it may not be the right time to do it in a formal way. I also explain that we are all “counselors.” We’re counseling our children as we train them in the discipline and admonition of the Lord, counseling as we encourage another wife who is in a difficult marriage to remain faithful, and counseling friends and co-workers as we walk alongside them in trials.

Counseling Is Discipleship

Biblically, counseling is the ministry of encouragement and exhortation. It’s sharing God’s Word as it applies to another person’s life. It’s discipleship or one-anothering. We won’t all sit across a desk in a formal setting but God has called and equipped us all. That is if we are saved and indwelt by the Holy Spirit.

Now I myself am confident concerning you, my brethren, that you also are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge, able also to admonish one another (Rom. 15.14).

Him we preach, warning every man and teaching every man in all wisdom, that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus (Col. 1.28).

The Greek word translated “admonish” and “warning” is noutheteō and can also be translated as counsel. Look again at the Romans passage. Paul said we are able to admonish (counsel) one another. Not with our own wisdom or strength but in reliance on the Holy Spirit (2 Cor. 3.5-6).

We Are All Counseling

And we are all counseling. The question is, “Are we being faithful counselors?” Are we counseling from our experience? Are we saturated with pop psychology and the world’s philosophies? Or are we counseling, admonishing, exhorting, and encouraging based on God’s Word and His principles?

That requires us to read and study God’s Word so we can apply it to our own lives and share it with others. Reading the Bible itself is essential. You can’t encourage others from the Scripture if you don’t know the Scriptures and understand them in context yourself.

No one has arrived in this area. We all need to study and grow in our understanding.

Resources that Can Help Us

Two books that can help us grow ourselves and better understand the process of discipleship/counseling are Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands by Paul Tripp and How People Change by Paul Tripp and Timothy Lane. Also, The Institute for Biblical Counseling & Discipleship (IBCD) has hundreds of teachings on every issue and struggle imaginable. Many are free.

A good way to help someone is to go through a book together. You can each read a chapter. Then meet once a week over coffee, at the park while you watch your little ones, or during your lunch hour.

You don’t have to be an expert on the subject. You may grow as much or more than they do.

You want to be sure that any book you study is biblically sound and will repeatedly take you to the Scriptures. Sadly, there are many books and resources that, while claiming to be Christian, are filled with pop psychology and unbiblical ideas. I’ve provided some suggestions below. And if you need others, leave me a comment and I’ll make some recommendations.

Some Suggestions

The Excellent Wife would be a great choice for a woman struggling in her marriage or someone just wanting to grow in her biblical understanding. The Complete Husband would be a good one for husbands to go through together. As I said, both of you will grow as you discuss what you’ve been reading.

Idols of the Heart is one of my go-to resources for almost any issue. It’s an easy read but biblically sound and helps us better understand what is going on in our hearts when we fuss and fight or just want things we know are wrong.

There are a variety of parenting books depending on the age of your children and great books on the basic doctrines of the Bible.

In fact, there are solid, biblical books on almost any topic (depression, anxiety, intimacy, living with an unbeliever, etc.). If you would like a specific recommendation, leave me a comment with a brief explanation and I would be glad to suggest some resources.

Today’s Other Readings:

Now a few comments on today’s other readings …

Psalm 22.1-8:

He Was Forsaken So We Could Be Accepted

My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me? Why are You so far from helping Me, and from the words of My groaning (v. 1)?

While David, as a type of Christ, may have experienced some of the feelings expressed in this psalm, it was completely fulfilled in Christ as He experienced, not only, the physical reality of death, but separation from His Father.

He was forsaken so that we could be accepted as His beloved (Eph. 1.6).

Proverbs 8.6-11:

Wisdom is the Better Thing

Yesterday we saw that wisdom is available to anyone who desires it. But even though it is readily available, it is not a cheap or common thing.

Receive my instruction, and not silver, and knowledge rather than choice gold; for wisdom is better than rubies, and all the things one may desire cannot be compared with her (vv. 10-11).

A person can have all the gifts and talents, all the resources, and all the opportunities in the world, but without the wisdom to use them wisely, they will come to naught!

Matthew 26.26-50:

He’s Not Surprised by Our Failures

It was night and Jesus had gone with His disciples to the garden of Gethsemane to pray. He had warned them that He would be betrayed and that all of them would desert Him. I love Peter’s and the other disciples’ responses in verses 33-35:

33 Peter answered and said to Him, “Even if all are made to stumble because of You, I will never be made to stumble.” 34 Jesus said to him, “Assuredly, I say to you that this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” 35 Peter said to Him, “Even if I have to die with You, I will not deny You!” And so said all the disciples.

What I love about it is not that the disciples were sure they wouldn’t desert Him, but that He knew beforehand that they would. Yet, He still lovingly taught and instructed them and then went to them immediately after the resurrection. He even sought Peter out personally to restore Him.

Meditate on that for a minute. When you and I fail, it is not a surprise to Him either. And He is just as ready and just as available to restore us, as well! Hallelujah!

Coming Up:

In the coming days, we’ll talk about how to rate yourself on biblical love, offering God your best, the importance of defending your faith, and pose the question, “Could you be raising little hypocrites?”

I hope you’ll sign up so you don’t miss them. 

Blessings as you grow in Christ,
Donna ♥

Note about this post:

I began blogging through the Bible in 2012 and have done so every year since then. These posts are the product of many edits and additions throughout those years. Some days I make major changes, other days fewer. 

A while ago, I read Jen Wilkin’s book None Like Him about the attributes of God. One is His incomprehensibility. In it, she says, “God is incomprehensible. This does not mean that he is unknowable, but that he is unable to be fully known.”

I have found that to be true each year as I’ve gone back through the Bible. Sometimes I find myself feeling as if a passage just appeared there for the first time. I’m reminded that no matter how many times we read through the Bible, we have only scratched the surface. I hope you feel the same.

Indeed these are the mere edges of His ways,
And how small a whisper we hear of Him!
But the thunder of His power who can understand?” (Job 26.14)

I sometimes LINKUP with these blogs.