What does the Bible say about marriage and divorce? Is divorce always forbidden? What about remarriage, singleness, and sex, both inside and outside of marriage? Does the Bible really address those subjects and, if so, does it have any relevance for today?

Also, in the book of Job, God talks about many of the amazing animals He created: the horse with all his strength and fearlessness, the hawk, the eagle, and a huge sea creature called Leviathan.

In fact, He dedicated an entire chapter, 34 verses, to this creature called Leviathan. Was he a giant reptile, possibly a dinosaur? And what was the point of it all?

Finally, our Proverbs passage talks about the drunkard and how, even after a hangover, he runs to look for his next drink. The world wants us to believe he can’t help it, that it’s a disease called alcoholism, but what does the Bible say?

Today’s Readings:

Job 41 & 42
Psalm 101.5-8
Proverbs 23.31-35
1 Corinthians 7.1-19

The Bible on Marriage & Divorce

1 Corinthians 7.1-19:

Sex & Singleness

Paul has a great deal to say about marriage, divorce, and singleness in this chapter. In verses 1-9, he explains that sex within marriage is God’s only provision for sexual fulfillment. That has not changed in spite of what our culture tells us.

I know this is a huge challenge for some of you who are single and want to be married. I want to encourage you that God has not forgotten you, that He is good, and that He will give you the grace to respond biblically to this challenge. We’ll talk a little more about Paul’s advice to singles tomorrow.

Marriage & Sexual Intimacy

Today let’s look closer at what he has to say to those who are married. Verse 5:

Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

For those who are married, sex is to be continual (see note below*). It is never to be withheld from one’s partner except by agreement and then only for the purpose of prayer and fasting and only temporarily. In the past, this passage was most often applied to women, but in counseling women, more and more often they tell me it’s their husbands who are not interested in sex.

It’s ironic that in a culture where sex is everywhere—on billboards, on TV, on movie screens, and on the street—that this has not freed people to enjoy God’s gift of sexuality. Instead, it has done serious harm. The reasons are many, and if you’re struggling with this situation, I would urge you to seek biblically-based counseling. If your spouse is not willing to go, go yourself.

The Association of Biblical Counselors (ACBC) has counselors all over the country. Find one near you here.

Note: Of course, there can be age and medical issues and separations like military service that come into play. God commands us to love unconditionally and He promises us His grace in the midst of those kinds of circumstances. Again, if you are struggling in these areas, contact a biblical counselor.

Marriage & Divorce

Paul goes on:

10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord. A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

Believers are not to seek a divorce except in cases of sexual immorality (Matt. 5.31-32), abandonment by an unbelieving spouse, and certain circumstances where abuse has taken place.

Even when there has been sexual immorality, divorce is not commanded. Many marriages have been beautifully restored when the unfaithful spouse repents and the other is willing to forgive.

If a believer has already divorced his or her spouse for unbiblical reasons, he or she is not free to remarry under most circumstances. More about that in a minute.

Physical or Sexual Abuse

(I’m republishing this section from an earlier post, “Can Christians Divorce?”)

What about cases of physical or sexual abuse?

I have always believed that if a woman (usually, though it could be the husband) or her children are being victimized in this way she should remove herself and her children and go to a safe place, perhaps permanently, as 1 Corinthians 7.11 states. I have said that this can become a divorceable situation if the Matthew 18.15-20 process is followed wisely and with the safety of the wife and children in mind.

My husband and I recently went through a study on marriage with material from Capitol Hill Baptist Church in Washington D.C. that clarified this for me even more. I don’t think I can say it any better so I’m going to quote their material:

After thinking through this issue, along with study and prayer, the elders believe that certain forms of abuse, including physical and/or sexual abuse of spouse or children fall within the category of desertion (because stopping the abuse requires physical separation, and is therefore a breaking of the covenant, etc.). Why? Because we consider this sin such an egregious evil that it rises to the level of breaching the covenant.

Now, does one fight, or one blow constitute physical abuse? How long does abuse have to go on before professed repentance and contrition is proved not genuine? Once again we quickly see that even when the principle of desertion is clear, its application can be extremely difficult, and requires patient and humble counsel and direction.

If you are in this situation, I would encourage you to seek wise and godly counsel from your pastor. This is one reason why it is so important to be part of a solid, biblical church. But if you don’t have a pastor, I suggest meeting with a biblical counselor to discuss your specific situation.

Now, let’s continue with 1 Corinthians 7.

Marriage to an Unbeliever

12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say. If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.

If a believer is married to an unbeliever, the believer is to do his or her best to represent Christ in that home and not seek a divorce.

14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.

This does not mean that the unbelieving spouse is saved, but somehow the unsaved spouse enjoys a special relationship with God. Not to compare God’s wisdom with human laws, but I imagine it’s a little like our immigration laws. When a citizen marries someone who is not, it does not automatically make him a citizen, but he is given special consideration. God will work in some distinct way in the life of that unbelieving spouse, often through the testimony of the believing one.

When an Unbeliever Wants to Divorce

15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.

If however, an unbelieving spouse seeks a divorce, the believer is not commanded to stay married. In fact, the verse says, “… let him depart …” At some point if the unbeliever shows no change of heart we must “let them depart.”

16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

Again this does not mean that we save someone else, but our lives can be used by God in a great way.

Content in Our Circumstances

Verse 17 from tomorrow’s reading says:

17 But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches.

God has called us to be content in whatever circumstances we find ourselves in, whether married or single. Tomorrow we’ll talk more about contentment in this area and one of the great dangers for Christian singles.

For one of the most thorough studies on this subject, you can purchase Jay Adam’s concise little book, Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the Bible.

I have, also, recently come across a couple of good books on abuse:

Called to Peace: A Survivor’s Guide to Finding Peace & Healing after Domestic Abuse by Joy Forrest

The Heart of Domestic Abuse: Gospel Solutions for Men Who Use Control & Violence in the Home by Chris Moles

Lord, give us the grace to find contentment in whatever state we are in—whether married or single. And help us to live our lives as faithful ambassadors of your grace and love, reflecting that love to others, especially our spouses, in Christ’s name and for His glory. Amen.

Today’s Other Readings:

Job 41 & 42:

Behemoth, Leviathan & Their Creator

In chapter 41 God continues to challenge Job’s assumptions about who he is in relation to God. He uses creation and His sovereign control of every aspect of the universe to illustrate this truth.

I was struck by the incredible variations in all the species that God created. A few chapters ago we read about the ostrich and what a magnificent bird she is, but it says, “God deprived her of wisdom, and did not endow her with understanding …”

Then we read about the horse and his power, how he is not afraid in battle, and of his pure strength. The passage goes on to talk about the uniqueness of the hawk and the eagle and the behemoth. Now in chapter 41, God describes a huge sea creature called Leviathan. It’s a long passage, but worth reading and thinking about.

Leviathan

The Mighty Are Afraid

This term appears in 4 other Old Testament texts (Job 3:8; Ps. 74:14; 104:26; Is. 27:1). In each case Leviathan refers to some mighty creature who can overwhelm man but who is no match for God. Since this creature lives in the sea among ships (Ps. 104:26), some form of sea monster, possibly an ancient dinosaur, is in view. Some feel it was a crocodile, which had scaly hide (v. 15), terrible teeth (v. 14), and speed in the water (v. 32). But crocodiles are not sea creatures, and clearly this one was (v. 31). Some have thought it was a killer whale or a great white shark, because he is the ultimate killer beast over all other proud beasts (v. 34).

The Henry Morris Study Bible (read more about Dr. Morris in yesterday’s post) says this:

41. 1 leviathan. Leviathan was evidently the greatest of the marine reptiles, or dinosaurs, something like a plesiosaur, perhaps, although modern commentators tend to call it a crocodile. Isaiah says that leviathan was “the dragon that is in the sea” (Is. 27.1), and the psalmist said that Leviathan “play[ed]” in the “great and wide sea” (Ps. 104.25-26).

41:10 dare stir him up. Although no man could overcome the leviathan, God could do so, just as He could overcome the behemoth.

41.20 a flame. Whatever the leviathan was, it was not a crocodile! Many of the dragon legends indicate that they could breathe fire, and there are indications that at least certain dinosaurs may have been able to produce and expel combustible gases which, upon coming in contact with oxygen, could have ignited. (Note: The KJV says “a flame.” Other translations say “smoke.”)

Interesting, at the very least!

The Point of It All

But the point of it all is this:

⁹ Indeed, any hope of overcoming him is false;
Shall one not be overwhelmed at the sight of him?
¹⁰ No one is so fierce that he would dare stir him up.
Who then is able to stand against Me?
¹¹ Who has preceded Me, that I should pay him?
Everything under heaven is Mine.

Remember, God is speaking, “Who then is able to stand against Me?” If the creatures God created are incredible, what should that tell us about the One who created them?

Job, too, finally gets it! And he responds with humility and repentance. And God later restored all that he had lost and more.

Psalm 101.5-8:

Sinful Heart Attitudes

Whoever secretly slanders his neighbor, him I will destroy; the one who has a haughty look and a proud heart, him I will not endure (v. 5).

Gossip is never a secret to God and attitudes of the heart like pride are just as sinful to God as those things we consider “serious” sins.

Proverbs 23.31-35:

Disease or Drunkenness?

These verses continue the subject of drunkenness from yesterday’s reading. Today’s passage says that, even after the miserable effects of a hangover, the drunkard runs to look for his (or her) next drink. The world wants us to believe that some people just can’t help it. We’re told that drunkenness is a disease called alcoholism. But God says, “Do not get drunk with wine …” (Eph. 5.18) – a command. God does not command us to do anything that is not in our power to obey with His help. This is not a medical issue. It’s a sin issue!

A well-meaning gentleman told my husband once, “But the AMA says it’s a disease.” My husband replied, “But God says it’s a sin. Who are you going to believe?”

When Adam and Eve disobeyed God and ate the fruit, they saw their own nakedness in a shameful, vulnerable way. Their response was to try to hide.

When God confronted them He said, “Who told you, you were naked?” (Gen. 3.11). Remember Genesis 2.25 said, “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” God’s question didn’t refer to their lack of clothing but to their source of truth. Who are you going to believe?

He’s asking the same question today to all of us in various areas of our lives. Will we take His commands and warnings to heart or believe we’re free to live any way we choose? And will we trust in His promises no matter what the devil and the world throw our way?

Coming Up:

In the coming days, we will finish the book of Job, spend time in 1 Corinthians, and continue our yearlong journey through Psalms and Proverbs. As we do, we’ll talk about heroes and the culture, the balance between freedom and stumbling blocks, contentment, and wise counsel, among other things.

I hope you’ll sign up so you don’t miss any of them. You might also like to check out our YouTube channel.

If this post spoke to you, I would love it if you would share it on your favorite social media platform.

And if you don’t already have a copy, you might want to purchase a copy of my eBook, 10 Benefits of Keeping a Spiritual Journal. It’s available on Kindle or in paperback (the paperback has 31 days of blank journaling pages with prompts to help you get started).

Blessings as you grow in Christ,
Donna ♥

Note about this post:

I began blogging through the Bible in 2012 and have done so every year since then. These posts are the product of many edits and additions throughout those years. Some days I make major changes, other days fewer. 

A while ago, I read Jen Wilkin’s book None Like Him about the attributes of God. One is His incomprehensibility. In it, she says, “God is incomprehensible. This does not mean that he is unknowable, but that he is unable to be fully known.”

I have found that to be true each year as I’ve gone back through the Bible. Sometimes I find myself feeling as if a passage just appeared there for the first time. I’m reminded that no matter how many times we read through the Bible, we have only scratched the surface. I hope you feel the same.

Indeed these are the mere edges of His ways,
And how small a whisper we hear of Him!
But the thunder of His power who can understand?” (Job 26.14)

I sometimes LINKUP with these blogs.