Controversial issues abound these days. It’s not just that they abound but the divisions seem to be deeper and more contentious. Controversial issues come up on social media, from political platforms, in the public square, on the news, on talk shows, and all across the internet. And they will also come up across Thanksgiving tables in a few days.

How do we decide when to engage in those conversations and how can the love of God and His wisdom help us navigate those controversial issues?

When to Talk about Controversial Issues

Controversial issues seem to come up everywhere. The news, talk shows, and social media are dominated by them. But they come up in all kinds of personal interactions, as well, and you can be sure they will come up across Thanksgiving tables next week. Those controversial issues include gender and sexuality, race, the right to life, and politics, among other things.

So, how do we decide when to engage in those conversations? And what do we need to remember when we do?

A Major Battleground

Of course, one of the major battlegrounds for controversial issues is social media. Whether you love it or hate it, all of us would agree that when it comes to controversy, the web is full of it.

I’m frequently disheartened, alarmed, and saddened by what I read there. I know that many things are posted out of genuine concern for wrongs people see around them or to defend themselves or those they love.

Other times things are posted out of a lack of knowledge or even a misunderstanding of what is truly loving. But it’s rarely profitable to comment on specific posts, especially publicly. In general, it will only fall on deaf ears and provoke controversy. And it is all too easy to give in to doing it in an unloving way because of at least some degree of anonymity. So, even when it is appropriate to comment, we should never give in to the temptation to attack or say anything mean-spirited.

But what about other kinds of personal interaction? Should Christians just keep quiet?

Opposing Views

There have always been varying views on religion, politics and other subjects. But today’s controversies too often turn ugly. Those with opposing views are unwilling to show any grace or even listen to the views of others.

As believers, that should not be said about us. So, does the Bible have anything to say about how we should handle discussions on controversial issues? How do we balance truth and love?

A Balancing Act

The Christian life frequently feels like a balancing act. Love versus acceptance. Encouragement versus warnings. Truth versus grace. Forgiveness versus consequences.

Some would say we just need to love and accept everyone as they are. Others are at the other end of the spectrum where they are willing to resort to anger and name-calling to get their points across. Neither one is biblically sound.

So, are there some biblical principles that can guide our discussions with others, especially those who strongly disagree with us on many current issues? I believe there are.

Be a Good Listener

James said this:

So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God (Jas. 1.19-20).

Sadly, many times we are slow, even unwilling, to hear, quick to speak and quick to get angry. And as verse 20 says, “the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” 

Listening does not mean agreeing, it just means listening: patiently, calmly and respectfully. We shouldn’t just listen with our ears but with our hearts, asking God to give us compassion for the other person even when we completely disagree.

“The beginning of wisdom is: Acquire wisdom;
And with all your acquiring, get understanding (Prov. 4.7).

Think of Others More than Yourself

All men and women are made in the image of God and are worthy of our respect. Jesus showed respect for the worst of sinners. Even when we must speak hard truths, it should be for the benefit of the other person.

³ Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. ⁴ Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too (Phil. 2.3-6).

Pray First

If you know you will be with people whose political or moral views are different than your own, pray. Pray for God to open hearts to the gospel and for them to see Christ in you (2 Tim. 2.24-26).

Pray for wisdom to know if and when to speak (Jas. 1.5).

Speak, Speak Truth, Speak Truth in Love

All that said, believers still need to be willing to engage in dialog about important, even controversial issues. This is especially important when the issues are moral and eternal (Ezek, 33.1-6). So, while we are to speak the truth in love, we are to speak wisely and lovingly (Eph. 4.15).

If You’re Attacked

Speaking the truth, even in love, often opens us up to attack. If that happens, we need to respond like Jesus.

¹⁹ For God is pleased when, conscious of his will, you patiently endure unjust treatment. ²⁰ Of course, you get no credit for being patient if you are beaten for doing wrong. But if you suffer for doing good and endure it patiently, God is pleased with you.

²¹ For God called you to do good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered for you. He is your example, and you must follow in his steps.

No Hard & Fast Formula

Unfortunately, there is no hard and fast formula for when to speak up whether over turkey and dressing, with friends or in any other situation. We need to pray for God’s wisdom and be willing to obey God even when it’s hard.

We need to speak the truth in love (Eph. 4.15) and refuse to be argumentative or contentious (2 Tim. 2.23-26). We need to pray before gatherings, especially when there will be unbelievers present. We need to pray for God to water any seeds that are planted and to rely on the Holy Spirit working in and through us at all times. And then trust God with the results.

Blessings,
Donna

Getting Ready for 2020:

The holidays are just around the corner and the new year will be on us before we know it. What will you do to make Bible reading an ongoing habit in the coming year? I’d like to encourage you to set a goal to read through the Bible.

You can sign up here for the “God’s Word Day by Day” emails. They will take you through the Bible in the coming year and help make the readings more applicable with practical commentary about the issues we all face.

Sign up now and each month, beginning December 2019, you’ll receive a “Prayer & Scripture Journal” eBook with the daily readings, questions to help you think more deeply about what you’ve read and room to add your own thoughts and prayers. (If you’re already signed up, you will automatically receive the link.)

Blessings,
Donna

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